Apologies up front: This will NOT be your run of the mill, chipper, the world smells like roses blog post from me.
This past week has totally sucked for me. Not as far as diet and weight loss, but just in general. It started last Friday with a trip to the DR's office for David. He has been having some pain in his left side again, same exact pain, same exact place. We know EXACTLY what it is before we even make the appointment. So we get to the office and the first thing the DR say's is...Oh no, please not again. Yeah our feelings exactly buddy.
We talk and it is decided that this time they will go in and remove a portion of his bowel. They will manage his pain over the weekend and see him to admit him on Monday and schedule surgery for Tuesday.
The right angle area is where he keeps producing scar tissue. It's been 7 months since his last surgery. It was 6 months before that one and 8 months before that one. And a little 2 years since the first one. They can not tell what is causing the tissue to form, and why so rapid. But it attaches to his bowel and grows over it and basically pinches it off. So that nothing can pass. That makes him feel full. Kinda like a barbaric lap band if you will.
If he forces himself to eat it causes suck bad cramps because he can feel the his body trying to break down the food so that it can pass. So he ends up not eating. Then starts to lose weight, and eventual dehydrate. That's where we ended up Monday. In the office he was so severely dehydrated that his legs had started to cramp, and his lips were all dried up. My poor baby. I can not tell you how bad it hurts me when he is sick and hurting. It breaks my heart.
So we were in the DR's office all of 5 mins and he sends us to the hospital to be admitted ASAP. The plans were to rehydrate him and 'clean' him out to get him to feeling some what better. The DR said that being home for Thanksgiving would be a great moral boost for him. And that the surgeon that would assist would not be able to get there until NEXT Monday.
Last night was a rough night. The stuff they give him to 'clean' him out makes him very sick to his stomach. He said his legs are not cramping any more thanks to the IV but now they are sore. I came to work, because I need to save my vacation time for when the actually has the surgery next week. We are waiting to hear from the DR today so see if he can be sent home today or tomorrow for the holidays.
So where does that put me? Stressed out beyond anything. We are still planning on having Thanksgiving at the house. Everyone should be here for Wednesday. David is acutally looking forward to it. He can relax in his recliner and everyone can visit him.
I wasn't able to get to the gym yesterday. So I took the stairs at the hospital in its place. I think I almost died some where around the 4th floor. I had NO idea stairs would KILL me like that. Even though I have been working out 5 days a week for 3 months, I wanted to die. I guess it was better than nothing, but tonight I will hit the gym. I need to feel like I have control of SOMETHING.
I weighed this morning, it said 295.1 I think this is my lowest to date. I need to go back and check. I am not calling it official until I am back working with Justin. Something about being on paper makes it more real for me. My clothes are feeling great tho. And I finally got my smaller uniform shirts in. I am looking forward to putting it on and seeing how it feels.
I will keep you all posted on how things progress. This should be an interesting Turkey Day to say the least!
And here is the winner!! Congrats Kati. I will be sending you out a box of my yummy new favorite tea, and a variety pack so you can try all the other flavors too. I know you are going to LURVE it just like I do.
Trish and Jenn (I hope that was your name). You both will be getting a variety pack too. So now everyone is a winner! Girls please email me 
Well I have been waiting to share this until I was reallllllllllly sure it wasn't a dream. Today (well actually a day last week) I drove right into Twotterville. This is it boys and girls, this is where I was before I let life get in the way of my dreams. From this day forward, it's all brand new. You know it its a hell of a lot easier to loose weight the first time, instead of the second (or third or fourth).
Today I feel totally renewed. Today I feel like it's finally the first day of the rest of my life instead of being stuck in some bad movie like Bill Murray in Groundhogs Day. Today I will watch what I eat a little better. Today I will push myself a little harder at the gym. Today I will start planning for the rest of my life. Today is a good day folks.
Guess what? I was tagged again! This time by Kati over at 
Oh geeze...I have had so many...marring my best friend, the birth of my children, taking our first family vacation last year. Seeing my kids face, when we pulled up at the cruise terminal was amazing. We made so many memories on that trip. So yeah I am gonna go with that one. 
Lord if you can't make me skinny, please make all my friends fat. (not realllllllllllll fat, just a little fat) 
Making people laugh(seriously...I aced this test)
Being a friend (I am loyal till death)(not that, that has acutally happened or anything..because then that would NOT make me a good friend)
Last week was my son Micheal's 14th Birthday. Every year we let the kids pick where they want to eat dinner, and everyone is invited to tag along, dutch of course. This year Micheal wanted to go back to Biloxi and dine on those yummy crabs that we enjoyed a few months back. So we all piled up and headed that way.
Now normally at a buffet, it's balls to the wall, no holds bar lemmeeatasmuchasIcanbecauseIpaidforit. Over the course of these past few months, I have totally changed my out look on buffets. Yes, I paid for it, But I am learning it doesn't PAY for me to eat at them...I just don't eat enough.
Anways, after we got there everyone headed up to fix there plates, and I usually go last. I stay at the table with purses and make sure everyone gets their drinks and stuff. So when It was my turn I came back and sat down. It didn't even dawn on me what I had on my plate, until some one said, 'We all know who is healthy at this table'. 
Well imagine my surprise when I look up and everyone is looking at me! That's when I really noticed what I had on my plate, steamed cabbage, a broccoli stir fry, some grilled shrimp, and a beautiful squash melody. And it wasn't piled high the the ceiling either. Just a taste of each thing. It wasn't that I was guilted into making my plate this way, for fear that I knew everyone would be watching. It was just NATURAL.
Yeah I know! I am still dumbfounded! I did allow myself dessert because I wanted it. I came back with a dessert plate (Normally I would use a dinner plate and try one of everything). I came back to the table with 4 different desserts. First was a half of what looked like a praline (its sugar and pecans for you non southern folks out there). I ate that. It was quite tasty. The second was a brownie, took one bite and it wasn't very good. Third was a bite size pecan pie. The shell was really hard and I couldn't bite into. So that went to waste. Lastly was another pecan bar looking thingy. I picked all the big pecans off the top and the rest, well you get the picture. And you know what? That's all I wanted. I wasn't even tempted to dive in head first into the chocolate fountain that I could see from our table. (well I was..but not for the reason you think). 
Yesterday started my 3 week of working this thing out on my own. I think I have come a long way. I used to really not want to go to the gym, to the point where I pretty much didn't go. Or I would go, and not give it my all. Which is almost as bad as not going to be really honest. Now, most of the time I DO want to go. Well let me rephrases that, I don't reallllllllllllly want to. But I do anyways. I know how many calories I want to burn and I get my ass in there and DO it.
Last night was the same thing. I didn't really want to go, but I went of course. I am enjoying the dreadmill once again. I have pushed past being in my head for the most part. The TV really has helped me. I am now working on my stride and pace. Yesterday I did not lower the pace under 3.0 mph. I know that isn't very fast for YOU, but for me its a hell of a lot faster than I normally walk.
After that I moved to the elliptical machine. This machine has been taunting me since I joined the gym. I see all these girls going to town, including my friend Anna, and it makes me so jealous! I have tried it in the past and was only to squeeze out about 3 minutes (and even at 3 minutes I might be fluffing the store a bit). Well I climbed on this beast and started slow, first I made it to 3 minutes, then 7, then 10, at 18 minutes I thought I would give in, but NOPE, not today boys and girls I went the full 20 minutes I set out to do!!!
Let me tell you how freaking proud I was of ME! After I snapped these snazzy pics, I climbed off that beast and wobbled the the parking lot, where I cried! Oh yeah, but it wasn't Weepy Me that was crying. It was I AM A FREAKING ROCK STAR me! After I updated my FB status, texted my girls and drank my liter of water I drove home, with a feeling like no other. I CAN DO THIS. I AM DOING THIS.
